The answer is a resounding yes, but it’s the least exciting kind of yes. It’s like winning a prize but the prize is a pamphlet on water safety. Those chills feel similar to the real thing—that tingly, cresting wave of sensation—but they’re hollow. There’s no emotional story behind them, no great song, no beautiful sunset. Just you, a dry mouth, and a body that’s screaming, “Did you forget I’m basically a houseplant with anxiety?”
So next time you get random chills and you’re not listening to your favorite track or watching a plot twist, ask yourself: When did I last drink water? If the answer is “during the Obama administration,” get a glass. Stat. And don’t you dare put ice in it—you’re already fake-cold enough.
The Morale of This Story? Drink Up, You Beautiful Dry Sponge
Here’s your takeaway: delicious, clear, and slightly boring. Hydrate properly so your chills stay in the domain of art and beauty, not in the realm of “oops, I forgot to function today.” Keep a water bottle on your desk. Name it “Squirt Reynolds” if you have to. Just make sure it’s near you at all times.
And if you do get chills from dehydration? Don’t panic. Just laugh at your body’s dramatic little performance. Then drink a tall glass of water, listen to a great song, and that time, when the chills come, they’ll be the real deal. Your body will thank you, your cat will stop judging you, and your goosebumps will finally have a worthy cause.
