Every navigation app in London freaked out. Waze told drivers to “ignore the feather explosion.” Google Maps suggested canoeing across the flooded roundabout. Apple Maps just showed a field.
Meanwhile, a cyclist filmed the whole thing on a GoPro. He’s calling it “Pigeonageddon: The Movie.” It’s already got 50,000 views on TikTok. The comments are brutal.
One user wrote, “That pigeon died for our sins… and a croissant.” Another said, “Upper Richmond Road is the Donald Trump of streets—always causing drama.”
The Croissant’s Origin Story
Detectives tracked the croissant to a bakery called “Le Crunchy.” The baker is thrilled. “Best marketing ever,” he said. His shop sold out in 15 minutes. People want the “Fatal Croissant”—a pastry with a tiny flag on it.
He’s even adding pigeon feathers to the display. Classy. The bakery’s Yelp page now has a five-star review that says, “Tastes like destiny.”
This is why you don’t skip breakfast.
