Burnt lentils. It smells like sadness. Keep an eye on the water level. If it gets low, add more hot water. Cold water will shock them and ruin the vibe.
Mushy lentils. Sometimes intentional (soup, daal). Sometimes a tragedy. If you want shape, set a timer. Timers are your friend, not a suggestion.
Underdone lentils served to guests. This is how you lose friends. Always taste before serving. If they’re still crunchy, say, “This is a rustic dish” while frantically microwaving.
