Picture this: It’s June 2026. You walk into a newsagent. The Freddo is behind a locked glass case, next to the scratch cards and a bottle of 20-year-old whisky. The cashier looks you in the eye and whispers, “That’ll be one pound, sir. And please, tell no one.” You’ve just bought a frog the size of a thumbnail. It’s almost cheaper to buy a live, limited-edition tortoise from a pet shop.
An investigation into how much the price of a Freddo has increased
Here’s a surprising fact that will blow your mind: A Freddo is now more expensive per gram than salmon. Not just any salmon—wild, line-caught, ethical salmon. You can literally buy a fillet of fish for the same price as three tiny chocolate frogs. This is the timeline we live in. The frogs are winning, and our wallets are croaking.
How to Invest (Or Just Survive)
So, what do you do? Option one: panic buy a pallet of Freddos from the 2026 batch. Option two: start a Freddo futures trading account. I’m serious—there are unregulated forums where people bet on “Freddo Spot Prices.” A friend of mine once traded a Freddo for a full English breakfast. That’s a better return than the stock market.
But the smart move? Buy a 3D printer. By 2026, it’ll be cheaper to manufacture your own frog-shaped chocolate at home. You’ll be the king of the office break room. People will whisper, “He doesn’t buy Freddos. He makes them.” Just don’t use cheap cocoa; they can taste the betrayal.
An investigation into how much the price of a Freddo has increased
