Do not freeze your screen during a video call with your in-laws. They will think you are a ghost. Do not freeze it during an online test—the webcam will catch you smiling at a frozen clock. And for the love of all that is digital, never freeze your screen when your boss asks you to “share your screen.” The silence that follows is the loudest sound in computing.
But if you must freeze it, do it with style. Whisper a little “freeze, buddy” as you press the keys. Give your cursor a tiny funeral. You’re basically performing a magic trick, and the audience is your own eyeballs. Now go forth, freeze something, and blame it on the Wi-Fi. I won’t tell.
