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Now, you must do a quality check. Pick one up. It should be light, crisp, and shatter when you bite into it. That sound—that crunch—is the sound of victory.

French Fried Onions Recipe French's Crispy Fried Onions | How To Make

If they’re soft, your oil wasn’t hot enough. If they’re dark brown and bitter, your oil was too hot or you fried them too long. Don’t panic. Even burnt fried onions are still edible—just call them “charred artisan garnish.”

Let them cool completely on the paper towels. They get even crispier as they cool. Patience, young grasshopper. Go check your phone for exactly 4 minutes.