Let me drop some chaotic data on you. Fact: Every single automobile has at least one more door than you think (the glovebox, the hood, the fuel cap). Counter-fact: Every single office chair has five wheels, but only four casters on your desk drawer. Mind-blower: A cruise ship has hundreds of doors but exactly zero wheels—unless you count the propellers. And propellers are just fancy wheels that push water. Are we counting? See? Insanity.
Are There More Doors Or Wheels In The World? The Debate Dividing The
And don’t get me started on digital doors. Your smartphone has a “lock screen” that opens? That’s a door. Your video game full of portals? More doors. Meanwhile, your virtual car in that game has wheels. Now we’re counting imaginary things. This is how you end up arguing with a cat about the existential nature of a doorknob.
The Verdict (Sort of)
After weeks of obsessive, coffee-fueled research, I’ve decided the answer is both and neither. The universe tilts slightly toward wheels because of mass manufacturing: billions of toy cars, billions of industrial casters, and the fact that every wheel on a plane is actually six wheels (landing gear, people). But doors are sneaky. There are more doors in a single hotel than wheels in a small town. I counted the wheels on a Jumbo Jet (32) and the doors on a cruise ship (I stopped at 400). It’s a tie.
So here’s my official, definitive, completely useless conclusion: It doesn’t matter. What matters is that you now have a glorious, infuriating conversation starter. Next time you’re at a dinner party and the conversation gets boring, just blurt out, “Hey, do you think a zipper is a wheel or a door?” Watch people implode. That’s the real prize. Now go open a car door, spin its wheel, and smile at the beautiful, pointless mystery of it all.
