Unless you pack a hamper like you’re off on a picnic with a Victorian explorer, you’ll be relying on the train trolley. That brings you a choice of: a sad sandwich (egg and cress, obviously), a pack of crisps that’s 80% air, and a cup of tea that tastes vaguely of plastic and regret.
By hour eleven, you’ll be desperate enough to try the “meal deal” for £8.50, which includes a packet of ginger nuts and a single banana that’s more brown than yellow. This is the real test of character on this journey.
Surprising fact #2: You pass through seven counties but also one tunnel that feels like an eternity
The Severn Tunnel between England and Wales takes about 5 minutes to crawl through. In that pitch-black void, you’ll question every life choice that led you to this moment—especially that second coffee. It’s the UK’s version of a mindfulness meditation, but with more hissing brakes.
There’s also a legendary stretch near Dawlish in Devon where the train hugs the seaside cliffs. If there’s a storm, the waves literally smack the windows. It’s like a free IMAX water show, except you didn’t pay for the ticket, and you can’t leave.
The UK's longest train journey that takes more than 13 hours | Travel
