So, next time you see that orange envelope stuck under your windshield wiper, don’t panic. Breathe. Then log on, pay or dispute, and reclaim your dignity. Just remember: in New York, you don’t fight the city—you negotiate with the pixels. And sometimes, the pixels let you win.
Oh, and one more thing: if you successfully dispute a ticket, treat yourself to a dollar slice. You’ve earned it, you beautiful, traffic-law-defying crusader. Now go forth and park illegally—within reason, obviously. The system is watching.
