The breakfast buffet is a beacon of hope for the hungover and the hungry. You’ll find a hot plate of scrambled eggs that look like they’ve been artfully mashed, plus sausages that are definitely from a pig that never saw a field. The hash browns are crispy, the baked beans are abundant, and the toaster is the slowest piece of technology since the abacus—plan accordingly.
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Pro tip: grab a table by the window to watch people shivering on the pier while you inhale your third round of toast. It’s a power move. And don’t skip the yogurt pot; it’s surprisingly good, but the granola has an ominous crunch that suggests it predates the hotel’s construction. Eat it anyway—risk builds character.
The Bar & Lounge: Where Conversations Get Loudly Welsh
Downstairs, the bar is a hive of mismatched energy. You’ll have families arguing over Monopoly, solo travelers reading paperbacks, and a guy in a rugby shirt telling a story about a sheep that “definitely knew karate.” The drinks list is safe—wine, beer, and the kind of gin that tastes like a hedge fund manager’s cologne. But the real star is the coffee machine, which dispenses a cappuccino foam so dense it could support a small spoon.
Surprising fact: The marine terrace was once a Victorian bathing resort, so technically, you’re sleeping where ladies in full dresses once “dipped” in the bay. Thank progress for central heating. Also, the seagulls outside are among the largest in the UK—they’ve evolved to steal whole pasties from your hand with military precision. Do not make eye contact if you’re holding a sandwich.
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