Purified Water
Use purified water for drinking, cooking pasta, or making ice cubes that don’t taste like your fridge’s soul. It’s safe, tasty, and won’t make your body mourn its missing magnesium.
Do not use it in a humidifier unless you want white dust coating your furniture like a creepy, mineral-based blizzard. Also, good luck explaining that to your landlord.
Distilled Water
Distilled water is the MVP of household machines. Use it in your iron (no scale, no angry spitting), your car’s battery (if you own a classic car that’s still wet—why?), and your CPAP machine (so you don’t breathe in bacteria).
Never, ever use distilled water for your fish tank. Fish need minerals to, you know, live. Pouring distilled water into a tank is like putting a human in a sensory deprivation chamber with no snacks. Your goldfish will stage a protest.
