Let’s quickly discuss what not to do. Vodka? Boring. It’s the bland toast of the spirit world—it adds nothing but a headache. Tequila? That’s just chaos with a lime. You’ll end up crying over a photo of your ex, holding a cup of nog and sobbing, “Why, Patrón, why?” Avoid.
Also, avoid red wine. I know it’s tempting to grab what’s open, but red wine and eggnog create a color known as “vomit beige.” The flavors clash like a bad breakup. Just don’t. Your taste buds will file a restraining order.
Science Says… Just Drink It
A fun fact: Some historians believe eggnog got its name from “grog,” a rum-based drink. So technically, you’re continuing a tradition older than your grandma’s fruitcake. Also, the alcohol slightly curdles the milk proteins—wait, that sounds gross. Let’s spin it: It’s a culinary transformation. Like turning a cheap t-shirt into haute couture. You’re welcome.
Perfect Pairings: Best Christmas Alcohol To Elevate Your Eggnog Recipe
Another surprising truth: The U.S. government once considered banning eggnog because of salmonella fears. But then people pointed out that dumping whiskey in it kills everything—including your shame. Drink up, democracy is preserved.
